Anyone who knows me and my family can pinpoint exactly where I got my smartass sense of humor - my grandfather.

I made the mother day calls to extended mothers in my life and after chatting with Grandma Jean she put JB (grandpa's long standing nick name) on the phone.

JB: are you calling to wish Jeanie a Happy Mother's Day?

Me: yes, I heard you two had a nice day

JB: you should be calling me because she wouldn't be a mother if it wasn't for me, you know

After a few giggles and getting caught up he ends the call with

"Tell old whathisface (hubbie) that I send a big wet kiss planted right on his lips, would ya?"

So JB - happy mother's day.....I bet you looked lovely celebrating in your pink chiffon dress while scratching at your 30-year old crabs.

That is kind of how my life went last week.  But then again, that is just how the apartment industry works.

I got a contract to oversee a property takeover in Charlotte, NC and at the last minute there is another closing in Raleigh.  We booked several last minute flights and hotels,  spent over 9 hours driving last week and we are going back at the crack of dawn Monday morning to stay for another week.  I left my entire suitcase in Raleigh because there would be no time to check any bags.  I brought home underwear and a blowdryer to make it through the weekend (1 of my dogs eats my undies so I have just enough for a week and must do laundry).  At least the trip back to Raleigh will have clean undies in my briefcase!

Then I had the bright idea to put on flip flops for the flight home last night and leave my work shoes.  I am super low maintenance and don't own much more than flip flops - so my only 2 pair of dress shoes are in my suitcase (in Raleigh)  And once we get off the plane, I will need to work.  So I suppose I will be wearing flip flops with a suit when I board the plane Monday.

The cool thing about it all is I am hanging with my old boss and good friend, mamma bird Tam.  We are spending our days, hotel room and all meals together.  This is heaven!  And no matter how difficult her wife (also a close friend) says she is...I love every minute I spend with Tammy! 

Did I mention the pet sitter?  Since Rob and Marc went to Buffalo for the Sabres game - we tried to get our normal sitter to stay at the house, but she couldn't...but her sister is good (or so she said) Well, I got home around 10 last night (after hijacking Rob's car from the airport parking lot) to find one of the parrots out of his cage and our house key in the driveway!

Although my consulting business is primarily training and software support, I know a lot about the multi-family industry so I get contracts to do all kinds of stuff.  I figure a paycheck is a paycheck and I will do just about anything right now.  While I am doing the takeovers (the Charlotte deal was a small community of 180 apartments so no big deal) I could still support my regular clients (the whole 2 of them!).  Now the deal in Raleigh has NO office staff and a few maintenance people and is 400 units.  And my other clients are already calling for stuff next week.  Whew!

I will arrive home late next Friday night and on Monday -off I go to do training for another client.  I requested Portland, OR but got Sacramento.  I leave CA around 7pm on Thursday and arrive in Atlanta at 5 am the next day.  Then I am off again - heading back to the west coast to conduct another training class the following Monday (location unknown at this point). I am sure the return flight on Thursday will be another red-eye ordeal.

I can't bitch!  I am self employed and if nobody calls, well you know.  Just a month ago I was freaking out that I would have to get a real job.  But shit!  Does it have to be planes, trains and automobiles?! 

So if you see a crazy girl with a suit and flip flops running through an airport near you with underwear hanging out of her briefcase and a phone glued to her ear....be sure and stop me to say hello!

Without much thought; if you asked me my favorite musicians the following people would fly out of my mouth

Ani DiFranco, David Byrne, Tom Waits and Iggy Pop (the godfather of punk).  I loved Iggy with the Stooges (although it was before my time), loved Iggy when he went solo and love Iggy when he got back and did some shit with Stooges again. - Here is where my "hippie with punk rock tendencies" shows up in full glory. Music

My appreciation for Iggy came along pretty late in life....nearly 30 years into his career, when I was about 18.  Lucy has a great picture of me on her graduation blog when a few of us had an Iggy fest of partying one New Year's Eve at a friend's house. Oops.  Sorry Lucy, may have given away my ID 

Iggy is not your usual sex object.  But I find him very sexy.  Go ahead, poke fun...I am used to it.  My favorite and most beautiful "Beatle" was Ringo and I caught hell for that when I was 4 years old.  I have never found the Geroge Clooneys attractive.  But you must admit, he has a pretty nice body....on the skinny side but hey - pretty nice!

Iggy turned 65 recently - he did an interview with Terry Gross on NPR that I have linked below.  Check it out.  Even if you aren't a punk fan, he is intelligent and funny and fun.  And a bad ass musicician with a great appreciation for music.

And you know who he is - "Lust for Life" (1977) was an old Iggy and the stooges song that made it to the movie "Trainspotting" and now has become Carnival Cruise Lines theme song.  BTW- the song is about drug use.  So go ride the carnival cruises....can't be all bad!

 Iggy on NPR

Most people don't realize that back in 1912, Hellmann's mayonnaise was manufactured in England.

In fact, the Titanic was carrying 12,000 jars of the condiment scheduled for delivery in Vera Cruz, Mexico, which was to be the next port of call for the great ship after its stop in New York. This would have been the largest single shipment of mayonnaise ever delivered to Mexico.

But as we know, the great ship did not make it to New York. The ship hit an iceberg and sank, and the cargo was forever lost.

The people of Mexico, who were crazy about mayonnaise, and were eagerly awaiting its delivery, were disconsolate at the loss. Their anguish was so great, that they declared a National Day of Mourning, which they still observe to this day.

The National Day of Mourning occurs each year on May 5th and is known, of course, as.....

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sinko de Mayo.

 

Whew. I need a margarita to wash down that cheese

I don't spend much time bitching about service that sucks these days.  Even a finger in my Wendy's chili would not surprise me.  I DO spend time thanking someone for offering more than I expect.....it is a lot more effective than bitching.  Besides, if they offer crap service, they probably don't care what you think anyway, right?

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So here is my thank you!

(and a little promoting of a cool product)

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Last year after being carried away by the tiger mosquitos in Atlanta (they are so big you can see the stripes on their legs) we decided to screen in our front porch.  Couldn't do the ghetto framed screen and we wanted to have it open during the bug-free months. 

We found this company and we screened in our porch last summer with their mosquito curtain product.  LOVE IT

This year was the back door.  With 2 Mastiffs, a traditional door with a doggie door would not work (and our back porch is too tiny for the swing of a door).  This company modified, customized and made recommendations to suit our needs.  Our screen will ship tomorrow. 

Their product is a great solution for bug deflection but is not permanent.  It is well made and we plan on using ours for years.  Did I mention great service (or you can order on their website)

Check them out....if you need to screen in a porch, gazebo or whatever - this is a way cool solution.   Okay, enough of my shameless promoting. 

Mosquito Curtains